Beyond the Tiger Mom: East-West Parenting for the Global Age Hardcover – June 26, 2018

Maya Thiagarajan’s book Beyond the Tiger Mom: East-West Parenting for the Global Age should not just be read by parents but by anyone interested in education, especially in improving it, both here in the US and in Asia. Ms. Thiagarajan, who taught in both public and independent schools in the US and presently teaches at an international school in Singapore, is well versed both practically and theoretically in educational theory from around the world. She looks at the positives and negatives of the Western educational system (positives: emphasis on creativity and individuality; weaknesses: insufficiently demanding, too much stroking of a child’s self-esteem without its being warranted, too little focus on building fundamental skills) and the Eastern system (positives: fundamentals, especially in math, are fully developed, memorization, practice drills, and a strong work ethic leads to academic success; weaknesses: too much pressure on students to achieve to the highest standards can demoralize those who are less capable—that is, hard work alone cannot always lead to success and leads to students’ shunning risks, too much rote learning diminishes creativity). What one is left with is that there are strengths that exist in both systems and a blend of these is ideal. What makes this book so special are her suggestions, based on research, of how to help one’s child both inside and outside the classroom to be a balanced learner who loves reading, math, language and ideas as well as a balanced individual. She includes brief anecdotes from her own experiences raising her children and being a child in India herself as well as brief comments from parents she has met and interviewed from around the world. These comments and anecdotes reinforce her message. I highly recommend this book as one of the most thoughtful, readable, and exciting books on education I have yet read. I have not just bought this book for myself but also for my two children and their children as well as for the head of a school with a local US and global residential enrollment. I encourage you to do the same!

Maya Thiagarajan is uniquely qualified to write this book. She grew up in India with Indian and American parents. She completed her education in the US at Middlebury College and Harvard University after which she taught in schools that served impoverished and elite American students. As a parent, she moved to Singapore and taught there as well. She shares her insight on eastern and western approaches to education.The first two chapters dealing with reading and math show how both the Asian parents and schools favor math. Parents say the high paying jobs are in “STEM” and note that in math, where answers are clear, kids (and adults) can be evaluated without favoritism. In the US, reading is valued and this is seen in the variety of books for kids, celebrity read alouds, DEAR (drop everything and read) programs, school libraries and the ever-popular bedtime story. Kids are asked at an early age, which books they like. Asian students are rarely asked their opinion.The later chapters deal with memorization, play, and the messages embedded in culture and family life. Each chapter is followed by helpful suggestions for raising and educating kids.Throughout the book, the rigor of the Asian testing system and the openness of the western system are contrasted. While stressful for students and their parents, Asians feel the test system gives their children a chance; otherwise, university seats would go to those with connections. These tests dominate childhood and teen years with parents spending small fortunes on tutors and reducing play time to minutes a day.In the west, universities look at a host of experiences and qualities which de-emphasizes any one test. Thiagarajan shows how American family and school focus on developing the child as an individual making the Asian testing model at odds with American culture. She also shows how western teachers in building creativity and self-esteem are sacrificing honest appraisal and discipline. Thaigarajan shows that Asian tests do get results, and those in the lower socio-economic groups learn more with this system than those in the US learn with its system.While this is a good overview, two areas of interest to me were not covered: does the need for rote memorization of characters effect reading and the appreciation of its role in education and the actual stakes involved in these tests i.e. what is the payoff of stressing out an 8 year old and robbing kids of their childhoods?As to rote learning, Thiagarajan shows how the words for numbers in the Chinese language demonstrate the concepts of math and may be a factor in math achievement but says nothing on the larger issue of learning characters which have become so far divorced from the words they represent. The number of characters a student needs to memorize is staggering and must surely deter children, who later become parents, from what we enjoy as recreational reading.Regarding buying into the testing system, it would be good to know what the parents are actually seeking for their kids, the odds of passing and failing and what happens to those who fail. It makes a difference in my mind if they are preparing their kids for a one day test for which only 10% will get any seat in college, or if they are competing for limited seats in prestigious universities. What happens if the student doesn’t make it? They can’t all be “cleaners” as suggested by one tiger parent. Do students in international schools escape these tests?This is a brief overview from an informed educator and parent who has wide experience in both systems.

What a book! Highly recommend to any parent... On a personal note - While I am absolutely not an asian, my parenting happened to have the asian flair, while my spouse strongly preferred the western approach. So, naturally, parenting was a tug of war for us. This book gave all the information and vocabulary necessary to enable a mutual understanding, productive conversation and agreed upon course of action when it comes to parenting. This book was a game changer for our family. Many thanks to the author.

They're all so smart, when I read it I hope to get smart too

This book does a really good job of helping curious parents find the balance between eastern & western philosophies related to education. You can pin point areas within which you can improve your child's academic station by reading this book.

It was interesting to read about the authors experience. She does not judge but makes an effort to understand the very different cultures and looks for ways to take the best of both worlds as a guideline for her own parenting journey. I did not like the last part of the book about metaphors, I found it too esoteric and somewhat far fetched.