This Is How: Surviving What You Think You Can't

I intend to update this review to be more thorough, but I have completed 200 pages of the 230 page book, and it has affected me more just in those few pages than many, many other longer and more complex self-help books ever have. Augusten Burroughs has been through it all and lived to tell about it, and he does so in a way that is so refreshingly simple and to-the-point, you know it has to be the truth. Because the truth is not so complex at its core; otherwise, how would anyone ever be happy with themselves? It's not supposed to be so hard, and Augusten Burroughs actually understands that. I've read at least a dozen psychological tomes concerning happiness written by PhD- and doctorate-credentialed authors, and they were very interesting books. But when it comes to the bare-bones of being honest with yourself about your personal happiness, you aren't going to read a better 230 pages than this. Update I see the reviews are still just as mixed as when I wrote my original review. I don't know what these critics were looking for when they picked up the book, but the author never claims to be a self-help guru. If you want that sort of thing, there are thousands of other books for you. Listing the chapters of this book would be lengthy (and not really necessary, since Burroughs does slide from one subject to another every couple of pages whether the chapter title changes or not. For me the book read fluidly from start to finish, like a long (and very good) conversation. The effortless segue-ways from one heavy subject to another are a credit to the author, and even more interestingly, I think it proves the interconnected nature of all the subjects in the book. Burroughs' themes in the book center around honesty with the self, not giving in to playing a victim in life, and handling the hardest obstacles with grace by accepting the world for what is is, not what you think it should be. Burroughs may not believe in God (though he does not expressly say so either way), but throughout the book, his awe at life is obvious---with both the terrible and the good, the book seems to say, you must accept everything as it is, and keep breathing even when you'd rather not--literally, and to be grateful when you could be bitter, such as at the serious illness of a loved one. The final chapter, "This is Why," is a simple and elegant closing on the nature of human life. Get the book! On expanding your opportunities to meet a mate: "Maybe you aren't even aware of how small a geographic circle you live in. But until you've stretched your borders just a little, you can't say you've so much as lifted a finger when it comes to finding love . . . it's unrealistic and passive to expect to meet somebody who shares not only your interests and sensibilities, but also your daily routine." Concerning weight loss: "If willpower is required to achieve [a] goal, that's how you know you don't want it enough at a deep, organic level . . . You only need willpower to get what you don't want or what you want to want. . . The reason it's impossible for so many people to ever get thin is because what they truly seek is something that can't be microwaved or ladled into a bowl."

If you're looking for a book that cosigns your suffering, this book will do that. It also goes beyond that into the truth of accepting reality as what it is and making the choices to create our own new reality. The truth is often hard to accept. This book is the Spoonful of Sugar that helps the medicine go down. Bravo to the author Augusten Burroughs who had the courage to put this out there without being attached to the outcome. Already one of my favorite authors, I don't know how I missed this one. I read this 14 years after it was written and found it spot on accurate. Highly recommend if you have the courage to face the truth of your own ability to choose peace.

For me it is great advice. I have much experience with typical therapy and already know the ropes. This Is How, really gets right to the nitty gritty , with absolutely no B.S. Having been a huge fan of his other books , and loving his irreverent humor, I was not expecting this straight forward no nonsense advice. It is not always easy to hear the truth but I give advice to people who ask for it, I feel it is a disservice to them to sugar coat things. This book is like that. If you would rather someone hold your hand and pat you on the back while you enjoy feeling sorry for yourself, you not care for the advice. I myself may not always want to hear that I am capable , and should, do what I know I need to do.. I do not want to make it sound like he is being brutally truthful. There is still some tasteful humor, but the better thing to point out is he is gentle with you as he explains how to recognize dysfunctional things you may be allowing in your life and not even realize it. It feels like a sensible manual for life. For example he talks about common phrases such as I just want to be happy. But points out things ways in which we tend to keep grasping at things , thinking that will make the happiness come while all the while we seem to have blinders on and don't even have a good idea of what happy is to us. I am paraphrasing all the that. It is simple , helpful , direct advice and in a very easy to digest format.

I am a fan of Burroughs' work and have read all of his memoirs and collected essays. This book, however, is a self-help book. Luckily, I had read a review that stated this before I purchased the work, or else I might have felt disappointed since I would have been expecting humorous stories. I wondered what advice Burroughs would give on the various subjects included in the title. As it turned out, Burroughs articulates some of my own thoughts and gave me a sense of clarity regarding them. He also offers insights that I had not considered. His strongest chapters deal with areas he himself has faced - addicion, self-esteem issues, grief, etc. - but his ideas in other areas appear sound as well. I am not a self-help book reader, normally, but I enjoyed this work and found it interestingly written and unpretentious. Burroughs does not appear to be out to create a guru-like movement around himself or a gimmicky best seller. His advice is useful and he seems to genuinely want to help people based on his own experiences and research. I bought the audio version. Burroughs reads it well and generally does not stoop to the theatrics of some of his other audio books, such as "Better Not Cry" and "A Wolf at the Table".

This Is How is exactly like Augusten Burroughs : real, raw, and smack in the face true. He gives the benefit of all his experience to the reader in a concise, unique way and it may not be everyone's cup of tea, because a lot of people want someone to hold their hand and tell them everything will be all right if they Only Believe. But that's not life, and that's not reality. Burroughs knows about reality, tough times, addiction, and he certainly knows about heartbreak and the ups and downs that life affords us. I found his advice to be perfectly modulated for an adult and not for the baby ears. He is funny, surprisingly tender at times, and always fresh and forthright. Amusing but also kind of....strict. And that's great when you are really ready to make a change, and not just get the usual pablum that is dished out in self help books. He does;t offer SEVEN WAYS TO NIRVANA or any ridiculous formulas or spiritual woo woo. He offers in self help what his memoirs offer in that genre. This is a great gift and a great help for anyone who is genuinely ready to take a second look at their life and make it better without the b.s.

I am now a poster child for "Don't just order a book on Amazon without reading the thorough description just because you happen to love everything else the author has ever written." Yeah, I totally did that here. I love all things Augusten Burroughs, but would I have purchased "This is How" if I'd realized it was a honest-to-goodness self-help book? Umm probably not. But I did, so I read it, and I was disappointed, but obviously that's because I didn't get the book I thought I was getting. As for the merits of this book on its own: well, I have never read any self-help books, and quite frankly I don't put a lot of stock in that particular genre. In "This is How," Burroughs tackles every subject an avid self-help book reader could as for: how to deal with being overweight, how to deal with anger, how to cope with grief, how to handle the loss of a loved one, etc., etc., etc. Yes, the writing is probably funnier and more blunt than the average self-help book, and I have to applaud Burroughs' overriding theme that you need to just deal with the cards you're dealt, try to make the changes needed to improve certain things, and accept that other things will just always be the way they are. There's no coddling here. Yet, I wonder how helpful any of this will be for someone who is actually looking for help and advice, not just reading the latest offering by their favorite author. Burroughs isn't a healthcare professional of any kind. He's obviously led a very colorful life and I believe he's qualified to dish out advice on some of these topics, but not all of them. Certain issues are limited to only a few pages, which can't be all that helpful for someone who is truly in need. Ultimately, I hope this is the author's one and only foray into the self-help genre. Here's hoping his next book is what all his fans are waiting for: another memoir.

What can i say, this book is truly amazing--- i am a straight married woman-- and could totally relate to this astonishing man. He does get a bit "all over" with his descriptions but it doesn't detract--- it DOESNT. I recommended this to all my friends and they have loved it-- You may find this weird but if you have studied philosophy of J Krishnamurthi or Eckhart Tolle -- this actually isn't so different-- yes the voice IS different, but the message is the same. Think about it before you pass judgment about anything including long held social beliefs on things-like 12 steps etc) I loved it and I recommend it. Many of my friends (while we differed on the parts we liked etc) enjoyed it as a whole. There are certainly going to be things not everyone can relate to or agree with, it gave me pause to think about "why" i have the beliefs i have or why i have constructed certain paradigms that i had knee-jerk reactions to (the 12 steps etc) I liked that the book made me think about some things I never would have, and also re-think about many things I have already read and try and put into practice. This book tells us many of the same things that so many philosophers have covered in depth--but Mr. Aug as a messenger will be able to reach a number of people who haven't read a lot about these things-- and that's wonderful to get it across to so many more people. The caveat : he does not mince words or write in a certain "genteel" manner which some may prefer their messages. If you want to learn something read this. but if you care about HOW you learn, then you will find fault with the author and this book.

I've read every self help book there is. Really. I have. Just about. And have been just about done with them as I began to realize they were all saying the same exact thing. Until this one. Being familiar with the author's sharp sense of humor in the midst of tragic occurrences (displayed in "Running With Scissors"), I'd been anticipating this book's release for months--I needed a laugh and I knew he'd give me one. I had just lost my Mum to cancer, am in the midst of a major career change, and in relationship therapy . . . you get it, it's all listed on the cover. This book seemed the perfect anecdote. And it certainly was. His direct honesty, slight jokes, and intriguing experiences came across as if I was sitting with that one friend--the one that won't let you get away with anything but can make you laugh until you soil yourself--yes, that one, for the three evenings it took to enjoy it. I didn't want the book to end. Recycled, annoying guru advice could not be found. Only real, "Ha! That's so true!", help from an expert. An expert who has lived it and is still living. That's who I want to hear from. Read it.

Der Autor behandelt unter anderem die folgenden Themen: Magersucht/Bulimie, Übergewicht, Suizid, Trauer und Tod, Selbstwertgefühl und Selbtsbewusstsein, Alkoholismus. Zu vielen dieser Themen lässt er den Leser auch an eigenen Erfahrungen und Lehren teilhaben. Der Schreibstil ist gut zu verstehen, auch das Englisch halte ich für gut verständlich. Burroughs hat zu allen Teilthemen Beispiele aufzuführen um seine Thesen zu unterstützen. Diese Thesen sind meist ganz einfach und überraschend einleuchtend, sodass man sich wundert, wie man nicht selbst darauf kommt. Vieles bezieht er auf die "Wahrheit", die allem zu Grunde liegt, quasi des Pudels Kern. Einzig seiner Meinung über Suizid würde ich widersprechen, aber da stehe ich meist mit meinem Standpunkt alleine da, darum mache ich da keine Abzüge in der Bewertung. Ich halte das Buch für absolut empfehlenswert und auch als Geschenk als sehr gut geeignet. Wäre es bereits auf Deutsch erhältlich, würde ich direkt mit dem Verschenken anfangen ;)

Interesting read.

Love this book. Have it From Audible but for this particular title, I prefer print. I found this different from most of Burroughs other works and found it has an offbeat wisdom. I gave it to a friend who lost her husband through alcohol and it was a comfort.

This book is for everyone and specially for teenagers.. Can get answers which your finding for mental well being Recommend

Very sensible book, I love common sense approach to feelings, not the psychological jargon (paid therapy driven). The feelings approach is very unusual in the western world. This guy understands the feelings like nobody else (maybe only the licensed psychiatrist Dr Lastname is his match). He really did break down any major feelings (shame, guilt, despair, grief unhappiness, lack of self-confidence, low self-esteem etc) into the tiniest possible pieces, detached them from anything else, stripped from the images they pretend to be and shows them as they are. And then tells you what to do with them, one at a time so they don’t have such a negative impact on you anymore.